the p's & q's


the p's & q's

It's important to start things off on the right foot, and I've done my best to thoroughly outline my expectations for our time together. They say rules are meant to be broken, but these ones are indestructible. Though I am a pretty free-spirited and fun loving woman, my few reasonable restrictions are to ensure the most mutually enjoyable time possible.

I am fully vaccinated (4x as of Oct 2022) and prefer to share my time with individuals who are as well. Please reach out to reschedule our time together if you are experiencing symptoms, or have been in contact with someone who has tested positive.

If you arrive to our appointment exhibiting illness symptoms, I will ask you to leave and you will not be refunded. Please respect my personal choices to protect my health and safety as I respect yours.

Government Issued ID

This is my preferred method of screening, as well as the quickest (it is the only verification I will accept for shorter notice requests). I do not store any sent images and they are manually destroyed immediately after verification.


Please include both the full link to your LinkedIn profile as well as a screenshot (either desktop or mobile) of the dashboard clearly showing the linked profile is logged in. I only accept LinkedIn profiles that are active with valid connections and profile photos.

Employment Verification

Employment verification is available for individuals who hold an outwardly visible position within their company. You must have a write up or profile on the public company website, and discreet email verification is required. Please see my booking form for more details.

Provider References

Please allow ample time for your reference to respond, and you must have given clear permission for them to provide the referral. The reference must be recent (within the last 6 months) and have a listed website, social media profile, or current ad. I do not accept references from agencies, may still require additional screening as per my discretion.

Deposits are a non-negotiable requirement to book an appointment with me. I require a minimum 25% deposit for all new and returning lovers. My time devoted to entertaining suitors is extremely limited, and a deposit merely solidifies your intention to meet on the date you’ve chosen. Deposits are non-refundable unless I am the party that must cancel or reschedule.

Life can get in the way of pleasure at times, and I do my best to be understanding when extenuating circumstances occur. If you need to cancel our rendezvous, I will roll over your deposit to another date as long as you contact with at least 24 hours notice. Cancellations with less than 24 hours notice will forfeit their deposit as a cancellation fee.

If I am hosting, please prepare my compensation in an unsealed envelope and place it in clear view (hallway table, kitchen counter) within the first few minutes of meeting. I am no wallflower, but having to ask for my fee is awkward and sullies the mood.

If I am visiting you, please leave the fee on the bathroom vanity in clear view. Allow me a few moments to sort the accounting before we get too comfortable. If we are meeting in public, you may provide the compensation in a greeting card, gift bag or nondescript book. 

Cleanliness is next to godliness, and you will always find me to be impeccably groomed and well manicured when we meet. I merely ask for the same consideration in return, so please take the opportunity to freshen up before we get closer. My washroom is well stocked with numerous toiletries (scented & unscented), fluffy towels, and multiple hygiene products. I do not shower with friends, I am an admittedly clumsy person and melting mascara has never been a good look on anyone.

As an extremely health conscious person, I only partake in activities that are safe for both you and me. Please be mindful of your health, and if you feel yourself falling under the weather do reach out to reschedule our time together. 

It should go without saying, but assuming makes an ass out of ‘u’ and ‘me’: I expect you to conduct yourself appropriately and respectfully in my presence. I am a pretty laid back person, but I do not tolerate boundary pushing in any manner. I will not ask twice to cease a behaviour I am uncomfortable with, and failure to respect my reasonable wishes will result in our session ending. 

While I am flattered that you enjoy your time with me, I am unavailable without compensation or advanced booking. Please keep your communications to booking related matters only, a messy inbox is not a girl’s best friend. A gift card is always the best way to reach out to say hello, and I always will send a thoughtful thank you in return.

A lady never kisses and tells, and I expect the same from my suitors in return. What happens during our time together is no one’s business but our own. I find review culture to be denigrating and overly simplified for a complex human interaction. Keep our escapades our little secret.

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